Payday Loans Payday Loans

Real Women Talking is here to frame, honor and validate the multitude of issues facing women today. “Being a woman today is exhausting.” “Life is like the staircases at Hogwarts, always shifting.” “Life is like being on a unicycle. You hope you don’t drop a ball or fall off the bike.” We have heard a resounding chorus tell us that life is not so easy.

Hundreds of women have revealed that they feel completely drained, kind of like a cell phone beeping at the end of the day, battery on the verge of being wiped out. So, given what we have heard, it is time to unveil what we have created as a mantra, to honor what so many women are saying they need, and to offer some much needed aid in this arena. Real Women Talking is excited to present a mantra for self-care: called “Positive Selfishness.”

These days, selfishness gets a bad rap in our society. And, it’s easy to understand why. But, we are not talking about being devoted to, or caring only about oneself. Rather, we are speaking about the tried and true adage of doing for self, so you have some energy left when all is said and done. Without this adage, we deplete and aren’t good for anyone, let alone ourselves, so we have heard, since the inception of our research.

So, what exactly is Positive Selfishness? It’s about making yourself the star of your own life, the main character in your own novel. Unlike the selfish person who is concerned only with his or her own interests, benefits and welfare, regardless of others, one’s needs and others’ needs are not mutually exclusive in the Positive Selfishness paradigm.

When we asked women what they did for their own Positive Selfishness: we received a flood of responses via e-mail, texts, our website and facebook page. This question struck a chord with women nationwide and sparked the quickest response from our surveys yet. Some women simply wrote back, “self-care, what is that?” Others answered, “does wine count?” Regardless of the answers women gave, one thing remained abundantly clear – there never seems to be “enough” self-care, or at least not consistent self-care. And, the reasons for that ranged from lack of time, cultural ideologies, lack of resources, and for some of those moms out there, lack of spousal support to boot.

With regard to the time factor, we are fully aware that the last thing women in America have, us included, is “time.” That said, it truthfully doesn’t take much time to make it work. It can be accomplished in small chunks of time. It can become part of your daily routine, much like the morning newspaper or a cup of coffee, tea or just a few minutes of quiet before the rest of the house wakes up. Before you go to bed at night, ask yourself: “what did I do for me today?” Answer it honestly ladies, and if the answer is nothing, or not nearly enough, then step it up tomorrow. Remember you are living your only life. What are you waiting for?

Positive Selfishness isn’t just about “doing” things, but is also about “thinking” about one’s self, or at least being kinder internally. One can practice Positive Selfishness without “doing” a thing. Real Women Talking has received numerous responses about “needing” to be less self-judgmental or critical. We also heard that even the act of “not doing” anything at all, can be an act of Positive Selfishness. As we’ve heard, “Something as simple as letting the dishes pile up for the sake of getting more sleep, unwinding and decompressing after a long day has been surprisingly effective in ratcheting down my stress levels and letting me enjoy some of the down time I didn’t realize was there.” “Nurture mind, body, heart and soul,” in your own way.

We dream of a day when women will have no hesitation but to practice Positive Selfishnes. Practice after all, is the key to success, as anyone lucky enough to play at Carnegie Hall can tell you. It’s equally true, that when you search high and low, and find the time and do more for yourself, you’ll have more deposits in your savings bank, and in turn you’ll have more energy to do for all the others who fill your world. And, talk about a happy world that would be.

We’d love to know what you really think… and while you are at it, what can you do for yourself? Or, tell us what keeps you from practicing Positive Selfishness… join us as we keep the dialogue open and very real.

© 2013 Real Women Talking